


Kittenshark not Sharkkitten, Todd!

by PursueCrazyLife



Series: The Adventures of our Psychic Sunbeam and his Depressed Giraffe Assistant [1]
Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: 42 percent success rate of finding pets, Fluff, Gen, Pre-Relationship, This is all over the place emotionally and geographically, Todd did not sign up for this, Where is the kitten?, crazy driving, low key traumatized Dirk, too much ice cream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 12:51:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9658190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PursueCrazyLife/pseuds/PursueCrazyLife
Summary: Two months after the kitten was lost Dirk knows it's time to bring the wayward pet home. A wild search ensues, and Todd is roped in.  But will the kitten embrace its shark status, and attack our duo or not?





	

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language, so I apologize in advance for any mistakes.
> 
> I'm in no way qualified to write for this fandom, but I have too many headcanons to not write. (Shout-out to all the wonderful DGHDA fanfic writers)  
> I just hope this isn't too OOC.  
> Enjoy :)

“We need to find the kitten”, Dirk said, which in itself wasn't that strange, but him barging into Todd's bathroom while the latter was showering was a little unusual.

“Dirk, get out!”, Todd shouted.

“I'm not going to look”, Dirk placed his hands over his eyes. “See I can see nothing. Oh, that was bad. Two times the same word in a sentence. This makes me a very boring person...”

“Can't you wait? We can discuss this after I've showered.”

“But I have my hunch now. You can't just tell the universe you don't have time when it calls. It would be very rude”, Dirk started to peek through his fingers. “Nice tattoo”

“Dirk!”, his still-friend threw a towel at him.

“Ow, after all we've been through, Todd."

“Wait outside.”

Dirk rolled his eyes, and went into the kitchen.

 

“Told you he doesn't like to be interrupted while showering”, Amanda shouted from the sofa.

“Who does like that?”, Farah asked.

Dirk sat down next to them. Checking the clock again. Standing up, and pacing the room. “We need to find the kitten right now. And I need my assistant.”

“Why?”, Amanda asked.

“Because I need protection.”

Farah addressed him with her Dirk-look. Described best with the words amazement-at-his-stupidity. “From a kitten? You need protection from a kitten?”

“Haven't you been listening?”, Dirk asked her, “It isn't just a kitten. It's a shark. Or rather more a kitten caught in a shark”, he halted in his pacing, “Maybe a shark caught in a kitten? I don't even know if it is actually a kitten or a shark. What was first?”

“Oh, it's the murderer of Patrick Spring”, Amanda said.

“Well, actually...”, Dirk stopped, “Does it even matter?” He sat down again. “Your friends aren't coming today, are they?”, he asked Amanda.

“Maybe, I don't know yet”, she smiled waving her hands in front of Dirk's eyes. “Look at the color. Vogel picked it for me”, this time a bright red shade decorating her fingernails.

”Looks like blood”, Dirk muttered miserably, “I don't like blood...well I don't like blood when it's not in its rightful place.”

“Are you in a bad mood?”, Todd's hair still wet, but he was wearing clothes now.

Dirk jumped up. “I will be in a bad mood after the kittenshark killed all of you.”

“Sharkkitten”, Todd slipped into his jacket.

“No, it's kittenshark”, Dirk opened the door, waving goodbye to the girls.

 

“But shouldn't we say sharkkitten? Because we should prioritize the danger. So shark first, kitten second”, Todd argued.

Dirk opened his car door. “Who told you kittens can't be dangerous?”

“No, I meant...you know what? Never mind.” Todd quickly buckled up as Dirk started the engine. A loud thump accompanying the roar of the car coming to life. “Is that healthy?”, he asked carefully.

Turning his attention to his friend resulting in the driver not watching the street, Dirk shrugged his shoulders. “I don't think cars have souls, Todd. So I don't know if we can talk about healthy in the context of a car.” It was going to be one of these days again. On some days Dirk made sense, and almost seemed to act like a normal human being. But Todd was not in luck today.

“It's been two months, Dirk. We don't know where the cat is. Why are we searching it now?”

“It's a hunch”, his friend swerved the car narrowly missing a lion on the street. Still his eyes fixed on Todd the entire time. Wait....a lion?

“Did you see the lion?”, Todd looked over his shoulder. The animal had now safely crossed the street.

“We have a more important case to solve. Or more tying up loose ends. I don't care if you saw a lion. The only thing I care about right now is a shark, a kitten, a kittenshark or....or a ladybird.”

“A ladybird?”

“I like ladybirds.”

“Okay”, Todd shook his head leaning back in his seat. Just one of these days when nothing made sense. Amanda was coming more often to his flat again. But he suspected it was because of Farah, and not him. Dirk was practically living with him now. Even if he always said this would _really_ be his last night he spent sleeping on Todd's sofa.

The impatient tapping of fingers on the steering wheel reminded Todd of his band, or his ex-band. Maybe he could start again? With a new name. Or maybe not he still had all the merchandise in the basement. Thousands of posters he had bought when he had been high as a kite. Telling everyone they would have a record deal by the end of the month. Truth be told they sucked. Nobody would have ever signed them. But a low-key band would be nice.

“So where are we driving to?”

“To the parks.”

“Parks?” He shouldn't have asked because now Dirk turned his attention back to him, and not the currently red light.

“Todd, this isn't an exact science. I just know we have to go to a park. Which park I don't know. Just that it's a park. We're going to start here, but maybe the park we're searching for is in Romania. Then destiny will bring us there.”

“Why Romania?”

Dirk rolled his eyes. “It was just an example. The kittenshark could be here, or in China, or somewhere. Point is we don't know.”

“I can't speak Chinese”

“We are not interrogating anyone, so we won't need that. Besides I can talk a bit in a few languages”, Dirk finally directed his eyes back on the street.

“Really? Where did you learn that?” His friend didn't answer. Seemingly far away- in his mind- not literally, that would have been pretty inefficient and impractical while driving a vehicle.

 

Dirk killed the engine in front of a randomly selected park. Jumping out, not using the door. The sun was beating down, and Todd regretted his decision of wearing his thick leather jacket, but then he regretted all other decisions he made in his life, well apart from maybe two he couldn't remember, so all in all it wasn't such a huge loss.

Dirk shrugged of his green jacket. Rolling up his shirt sleeves. “Let's go.”

“And you're sure the sharkkitten is here?”

“Yes, the kittenshark will be here somewhere.”

“Define somewhere.”

“Everywhere”, Dirk took his first step towards the path. Turning on the instinct of knowing Todd wouldn't follow.

“I have experience with finding pets, Todd. Great experience. We had a few losses. For instance Dali the Lama bit the dust quite literally. Poor thing tumbled down the mountains into the desert. Its head covered in sand. Its lungs covered in sand. It slowly suffocated”, Dirk shook his head, “Dali died a hero.”

“What?!” Maybe it was the sun, or the fact he hadn't slept much last night, but Dirk sounded stranger than usual.

“Anyhow”, Dirk smiled, “I have an amazing success rate of 50%.”

“That's like only half. That's not a success rate. That's just a rate.”

Dirk still smiled, a bit more forced now. “Better than a success rate of 42%.”

“Why 42?”

“I don't know. I was making an example”, Dirk took a deep breath calming himself. “Let's go.”

 

What followed was a long tiresome walk through the rich fauna and flora of the Pacific Northwest. Dirk stretched his hand out. Letting his fingers touch the high undergrowth.

“Isn't it beautiful?”, he smiled while picking daisies, “I love the outdoors.”

Todd hated the outdoors. He discovered another tick, and quickly snipped it away. “Are we close?”, he asked, worn out already.

“We are close”, Dirk replied too brightly.

“You know, you're the worst liar?”

“I would take it as an insult, but because it's coming from you I don't”, Dirk started to link the daisies together.

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, you know...your relationship with truths and lies.” Todd glared at him. “Sorry, that wasn't a nice thing to say. A very unfriendly thing to say. I'll take it back, sorry. Could I interest you in a daisy bracelet?”, he showed Todd the daisy chain.

“I'm not a girl”, Todd protested, but Dirk already took his hand slinging it around his wrist.

“Here you go. Everything is connected”, he linked the two ends together.

They came to a clearing. Bringing back signs of civilization. People sitting by the riverside. Dirk stopped shielding his eyes from the bright sunlight.

“Do you see the kitten?”, Todd stepped beside him.

“What are they doing?”, Dirk pointed towards a family. Sitting on a blanket, and eating.

“Ahem, they're having a picnic”, Todd answered.

Dirk nodded, but his eyes confused, “What's a picnic?”

“You don't know what a picnic is?”, Todd teased. In hindsight the wrong thing to say. His friend turned, looking away. “You eat outside. That's basically a picnic. Didn't your family ever picnic?” Shaking his head sadly Dirk kept observing the family.

“I don't think the kitten will be here”, Todd broke the silence, noticing that Dirk was slipping back into this daze that had started after Dirk had escaped Blackwing a month ago. Todd still didn't know if this was because of Blackwing, or because Dirk was currently not hell-bent on solving a case.

“Why not?”

“The family has a dog.”

“Do you think a kittenshark, or a shark would be chased by a dog?”, Dirk asked, his voice serious.

“Honestly, I never thought about it.”

“Well, it doesn't seem to be here. Let's have some ice cream.”

“But I thought...”, Todd started, slipping quickly into his normal state of confusion whenever he was surrounded by Dirk. “Wait”, he quickly followed, but couldn't stop the catastrophe.

Dirk had already purchased 4 scoops of ice cream. “You want some as well?”, he shouted over to Todd.

Being the responsible adult that Todd was, someone had to be, he took one scoop. They sat down on the grass.

Dirk beaming. “Are we having a picnic now?”, he asked between mouthfuls of strawberry ice cream.

“Yes, I guess so.”

“Great. This is something friends do, having picnics in parks, right?”

“More like a date”, Todd didn't say. Settling with a simple nod. Marveling how easily excited Dirk could be. Trying not to smile at his friend's antics, but he couldn't help it. Soon Todd was finished with his ice cream. “You don't have to eat everything”, he tallied the amount of sugar. Already panicking about the impending sugar-high Dirk would experience.

“I love ice cream. I haven't eaten ice cream for ages now. Well not exactly ages, but...actually the last time I ate ice cream was...”, he smiled brighter, “Let's make new memories. Ice cream here with you, right?”

“Right.” 

“Good, you are being a great assistant, Todd. I had a few doubts, but you have proved to be a valuable asset in my investigatory process.”

“Thanks, Dirk.”

“You're welcome mate.”

“Mate, that's a new one.”

“I'm just trying everything out. I always wanted to give all my friends different friend titles, but I only have one friend, which I'm grateful for, but you will have to live with being called different titles. So mate, let's search on.”

“In this heat?”

Dirk, hands now sticky from the slowly melting ice cream dripping onto his shirt giving him the appearance of a 3-year-old not a man in his 30's, turned towards Todd again.

“We will see this through. It was our fault that we lost the kittenshark. So we should make sure we find it. There already have been too many deaths linked to us.”

“We? I didn't lose the sharkkitten.”

“Kittenshark, and Todd, you were there when we lost it. So technically it's your fault as well”, Dirk wanted to say more, but became distracted by his now dissolving ice cream.

Todd used the opportunity. “Why do we have to search for the sharkkitten now? It has been on the run for what...two months? And you didn't care then. Why is it all of a sudden so important to you?”

“I forgot, okay? I was tied up literally for the first month, and then I forgot. Things like this tend to happen. Like you forget to turn off your stove, and the flat gets disintegrated. Situations like this happened to the best of us. It's important then to act accordingly. To keep the catastrophe at bay. To clean the flat, throw out the stove, and never cook again if you can help it. Now use this metaphor, because it's a metaphor, this did not happen to me! Use this example, albeit an unrealistic example, for the kitten”, he stuck out his tongue to take another mouthful from the miserable rest of his ice cream.

Todd's head swam from too many words being uttered in a too short time. “So we find the kitten, and don't adopt it, or what?” Dirk shook his head vehemently. Still mouth filled not capable to speak just yet.

They were walking along the river of the park now. Todd didn't know which direction they were going. He was sure Dirk didn't know either. If this had been anyone else than Dirk he would have packed up, and went home. But it was Dirk, so he stayed. Didn't mean he had to be thrilled about it. In fact he wanted to embrace his bad mood.

“Of course we adopt it”, Dirk finally released from his self-made prison from the act of eating. “Though we should use the machine. I still wonder which animal we'll have then. Do we need an aquarium?”

“What are you talking about? There is no machine. We sent it back”, Todd closed his eyes, tired from this.

“Oh... I didn't...”, Dirk stammered, “You know what I had been occupied by other things when we sent the machine back. I was busy dying.”

Todd flinched slightly. That night still haunting him in his dreams. Yes he had hated Dirk then, but his friend had been dying.

“Don't say that.”

“It's a fact. And you should...”, he stopped, gazing into the river. A few fish just visible under the murky water. “Todd, is there a Japanese park here in the area?” He should be used to it by now, these tangents of conversation changing from one minute to the next. But it still caused whiplash.

“Yes, but why....”

“The kittenshark will be there.”

“Okay.” The sooner they found the kitten the quicker they could get home.

Dirk bounced in anticipation. “Solving a case is fun, but tying up loose ends isn't that bad either”, he finally had finished his ice cream.

 

The sugar now in his blood made itself noticeably through even worse driving.

“Who taught you to drive?”

“Riggins”, Dirk smiled broadly, “I accidentally missed the brake, and slipped on the accelerator. He was mad”, he still laughed.

“Did you have an accident?”

“No, it honestly was an overreaction on his part. The wall was like 2 feet away. You can do a lot to hinder an accident when your 2 feet away.”

“Could you please drive more carefully, just for me?”, Todd tried to convince his friend.

“Todd”, Dirk leaned over, placing both his hands on Todd's shoulders, his hands decidedly not on the steering wheel, “Nothing will happen to us. We survived hardships before. Dangerous situations. Near-death experiences. Existential crisis. The universe is protecti....”, the car either having required a mind of his own, or just the fact that it was technically without a driver, swerved off the street. Downhill crashing into a wall of thick bushes. Dirk managed to use the brakes. He slammed against the windshield frame. Bringing the vehicle to a halt.

Neither men said anything. Thinking about there near demise. Todd about his still not entirely fixed relationship with Amanda. Dirk about the luck he had with keeping a friend, and actually spending time with him. Either Blackwing or death kept hindering him. Of course Dirk couldn't stay speechless for long.

“We survived! You see Todd, we survived”, he shouted excitedly, blood running down his forehead, “The universe is protecting us.”

Todd lunged forward grabbing him by the collar. “You nearly killed us again, Dirk!” He could see fear in his friend's eyes. He let go, and tried to open the door. They were surrounded by the bushes. Thorns ripping their clothes and skin.

“Is the engine still working?”, he shouted over to Dirk. Having given up to get out, and walk home. He didn't want to leave Dirk alone with a head wound and a car. Maybe the latter part was more important. Dirk and driving should never ever be put in a sentence again. Dirk turned the key. The engine came to life. Still sounding strange, but working.

“See the man was right. This is a car for treasure hunts off-road.”

“Give me the keys”, Todd said.

“Why? It's working we can drive.”

“I can drive. You are not allowed to drive.”

“But this is my car.”

“You swapped it with a rental!”

“But I...I always drive. Assistants don't get to drive. Only detectives do that. That's why it's called Driving Detective, two D's. Not Driving Assistants. DA doesn't make sense. Or Driving Dirk much better than Driving Todd.”

He took a deep breath clambered over to his friend, and tried to get the keys out of his hands. Dirk struggled keeping a death grip on them.

“If you don't give me the damn keys I am going to leave you here. You can go search your sharkkitten all by yourself!”

“It's a kittenshark!”, Dirk shouted tugging at the keys.

“Okay, okay a kittenshark, but we have to find it together, right?” Dirk nodded. “So I need to be there as well. And I am only coming if you let me drive, okay?”

Dirk thought about it for a moment then nodded. They changed places.

“Seatbelt on!”, Todd said.

“I'm not a kid anymore”, Dirk said, remains of ice cream still on his shirt. His tie loosened, his hair unruly.

“I have a seatbelt as well. Now do you want to find the sharkkitten or not?” With a sign Dirk obeyed.

For precisely five minutes Dirk said nothing silently moping. But then he sat up. “You are not angry with me, are you?”, he asked.

Todd unlike Dirk knew that for a safe driving experience you needed to actually look at the road. So he didn't engage in eye-contact. So the otherwise rude reaction, of not looking at your conversation partner, will be forgiven because of this special reason.

“I was worried. Put some pressure on the wound.”

“We don't have any pink plasters left? Because I don't need them.”

“We used them all up.”

“Good.”

“I have tissues in my jacket. Use one of them. Don't under any circumstances take the seatbelt off.” Dirk quickly pulled his hand away from the buckle.

“Are you feeling dizzy, sick or seeing double?”

“No, should I see double?”

“No, I just want to know if I have to drive you to hospital or not.”

Dirk tensed up, “We have to find the kittenshark, and after that we have to adopt the kitten or...I'm not exactly sure what we'll do if it's a shark. Then we need to...to...solve other things. Loose ends, you know. Tie everything up into a satisfying ending, and then start a brand new adventure. We don't need any hospitals, tests or syringes...”

“Who said anything about syringes?”, Todd didn't have to glance at Dirk to know he had turned pale.

“I assumed...”, Dirk's voice shaking by now.

“It's okay. We'll ask Farah to take a look at you. She knows a lot about everything.”

“Okay...”, his voice still shaking.

“You know what happened to the Lydia dog?”, Todd asked trying to distract Dirk.

“Rapunzel?”

“That's the name?”

“Yes, don't you like the name?”

“Well, it's certainly a strange name for a dog.”

“No offense, but Todd is a strange name as well. You know that your name means death, or nearly death...because one letter is missing from the German word Tod? I would be nervous with a name like yours.”

“Thank you, Dirk for being so reassuring.”

“I think Bart took him.”

“Do you know Bart from somewhere? Farah mentioned you had a weird connection with her.”

“I...she seems familiar, but I can't really place it.”

“Hmm. So you escaped together. How is she?”, Todd asked, in hindsight not such a good idea as he was trying to calm his friend down, not further agitate him.

“Yes. We need a proper name for the kittenshark”, Dirk changed the subject.

“What do you want to call the sharkkitten?”

“Sharky.”

“Really, no offense, but you are more creative than that."

“I am creative with names.”

“Sure you are.”

“Well we can't call the kittenshark Mexican Funeral.”

Before Todd could respond Dirk unbuckled himself, standing on the seat of the still driving car. “There! The kittenshark must be there!”

“Sit down or I'm going to turn around, and drive home!”, Todd managed to deliver this eerily similar to his mother's voice. Dirk sat down, his fingers drumming against the car door.

 

In the exact moment the car stopped, Dirk jumped out of the jeep. “Todd, we don't have much time.” He raced towards the entrance of the park. His head wound couldn't be that bad if he managed to run that fast Todd decided. Quickly following him.

He nearly ended up barging into Dirk. He heard the meowing. Finally they had found the kitten he took a step forward to retrieve the kitten, but Dirk stopped him.

“What if the kitten turns into a shark now?” Todd hadn't thought about that yet. Now he did, and felt a lot less relieved.

“What does your hunch tell you?”

“You know my hunches don't generally help, or have a good outcome for me.” The cat came nearer.

“So what is your hunch? We'll just do the opposite of that.”

“But what if my hunch knows that I will do the exact opposite? So for once the hunch is useful, and when acting against it I will get myself into danger.” Todd thought about this. The cat coming nearer.

“I don't care let's run”, Dirk grabbed his wrist, and pulled him along. They raced along the small lakes, the bridges. Through colorful vegetation, and passed confused park guests. “Mommy, why are they running away from a kitten?”, a girl asked her mother. Eyes wide. If they weren't careful the police would arrest them. And after Estevez had been killed they didn't have any contacts there. Would Farah bail them out? She would. He hoped she would. He wasn't sure if she would bail them out.

“Do you know about Schrödinger's cat?”, Dirk panted.

“Are you trying to complicate the situation even more?”

“No, but it could be the clue. If we both don't look at the cat then it can't be a kitten or a shark.”

“Other people are still observing the sharkkitten.”

“But they don't know about the kittenshark.” A strange logic, but he didn't want to nitpick because the entire shark in a kitten thing was strange to begin with.

He noticed that Dirk seemed to be in a remarkable good physical condition. Still running at a nerve-wreaking speed, as Todd slowed down more and more. Asking himself how bad it would be to get killed by a shark.

When he heard a crash. Dirk had tripped over undergrowth. Head first into the ground. Images of Dali the lama suffocating made Todd stop. He quickly turned Dirk over. To his relieve his friend immanently sat up.

“Where's the kitten?” Another meow made them both look into the eyes of their enemy. Intimidating at its full height the small kitten moved closer.

“Maybe it's just hungry. I mean we were actually friends, the kitten and I. I wanted to adopt Sharky.”

“Have you seen yourself making friends?”, Todd inched closer to Dirk.

“That's rude, Todd. I have no problem making friends. Well the process doesn't always end well. But what even is the definition of a friend? You can have people you call friends, that aren't actual friends, but you lie about that, so you don't feel like a broken person who can't connect with other people, and...” the kitten laid its paw on Dirk's shoe. Interrupting his monologue. “Todd!”, he pulled his legs to his chest.

“This isn't good...Todd, you were my best friend. It has only been a short while. Only one case actually....that's a bad percentage for you as an assistant. You are worse than me at being a detective. But still we saved a life. Well, and didn't save a few others, but what are statistics when we could help one person, and find each other. The Watson to my Sherlock. That's what I always wanted. A real friend.”

The kitten was now next to Dirk's hand. Sticking his tongue out as if to taunt them in the last seconds of their tragically depressing lives.

Todd laid his hand on Dirk's shoulder. Squeezing it tightly. “You know you are the best friend I ever had, Dirk?” His friend beamed, tears in his eyes. Dirk opened his mouth to respond when the kitten licked his hand.

“Ah....”, Dirk jumped to his feet. Cradling his hand in front of his chest. “The kittenshark licked me!” The kitten ran away.

“Dirk, are you alright?”, Todd felt his heart pound hard in his chest.

Dirk still pale nodded. “The kittenshark didn't turn. I think it's harmless, for now.”

“Harmless?!”, Todd couldn't believe it. They had been screaming like girls because of a sharkkitten that didn't attack?

“It's running away again”, Dirk stumbled after it. The kitten majestically crossed the bridge. Dirk majestically followed the cat only to lose his balance, and slip on the wet surface. Tumbling down because of the non-existent safety railing into the shallow water. To Todd's surprise the sharkkitten halted, and jumped in as well.

“Why is the kitten in the lake?”, he shouted towards his friend. Who was drenched in water, but otherwise fine.

“Because it's a bloody shark”, he shouted, fear in his eyes as the kitten swam towards him.

“Just don't throw it”, Todd shouted, “Take the sharkkitten carefully.” Dirk's eyes wide as he inched away from the kitten. “You are Dirk Gently, you can do this”, Todd tried to sound reassuring, but he was terrified as well. What if water triggered it?

Dirk nodded, taking a deep breath he took the kitten. To both their utter surprise the kitten stayed a kitten. Purring, and snuggling against Dirk's cheek. “Ow”, Dirk grimaced in pain.

“Are you okay did the shark...”

“No, I think a fish just bit me. Not a shark just a fish. Hey Sharky, don't run away again”, Dirk stepped onto the bridge. Water dripping down from him. A slight shiver running through his body.

“Seems to be safe”, Dirk said.

 

Wrapped in Todd's jacket the kitten and Dirk sat content next to Todd as he drove them home. The sun was setting as Todd parked the car. It gave the whole street a reddish glow. Normally Todd didn't notice such spectacle of beauty, but because he nearly died today he did notice.

“Look at the view. It's beautiful”, he muttered, eyes fixed on the sun-flooded city laying in front of them.

“Yes, it's a very beautiful view”, Dirk said. From the corner of his eyes Todd could see that Dirk was looking directly at him. And ignoring the real beauty.

“Let's get inside”, Todd finally decided. Starting to feel uncomfortable under Dirk's gaze.

Amanda and Farah were in the middle of a video game when they entered. “What happened? Are you okay?”, Amanda asked. Taking in the rumpled clothes, and the blood on Dirk's forehead.

“Yes, we had a very exciting day”, Dirk smiled sitting next to Amanda. Kitten still in his arms.

“Is that the sharkkitten?”, she asked in awe. Dirk rolled his eyes, “It's the kittenshark.”

“No, if you want to have a badass brand you need to have the most terrifying word set at the beginning.”

“Kittens can be dangerous as well.”

“Have you ever seen a kitten attack people, and kill them?” Dirk and Todd both nodded. “Oh, yeah you did.”

Farah unlocked the safety of her gun. Training the muzzle against the kitten's forehead.

“Hey, don't shoot”, Dirk swatted the gun away. Shielding the kitten from the weapon.

“We don't know when this kitten will turn into a shark again. And who its next victim will be.”

“Farah, please it's just a kitten”, Todd said, they were definitely not going to tell them about their chase with the kitten. How they had both been afraid of a harmless, relatively harmless, kitten. Definitely not.

“I'm not letting this kitten get near you”, she told Amanda, and pulled her towards the kitchen.

Todd followed them. “Could you take a look at Dirk's injury?”

“If you keep that kitten on your lap, Dirk.”

“Yes of course. Sharky is tired, and wants to stay with someone who is more mentally adjusted than you are”, Dirk stroke the black fur.

Farah narrowed her eyes, but started her examination. “A slight concussion. Take it easy for a few days, if you can do that.”

“Of course I can. You know that the third rule of being a brilliant detective is to observe people. Be a tree.”

“A tree?”, Farah asked confused. Todd shrugged his shoulders. He was tired, and finished with deciphering Dirk's cryptic dialogue.

“Yes, stand as still as a tree. If you believe enough in being a tree you will become a tree. You'll blend in, and the person you observe will not notice you.”

Farah rose her eyebrow, opening her mouth, but then closed it again. Shaking her head. “A lost cause”, she muttered under her breath, and headed back to the kitchen.

 

Staying with the kitten on the couch Dirk lay down. Still wearing Todd's jacket. His clothes had dried in the warm air he felt warm and comfortable. They had solved the case, or well tied up one loose end. The kitten was safe, hopefully. He could hear Amanda and Todd bickering which they had taken up to do for a few weeks now. Dirk sincerely hoped that this would be the start of their relationship taking a turn for the better. From time to time Farah threw in a few words. Their conversation cancelling out the silence.

His muscles ached. It had been a day of running. Too much running involved these days. The soles of his shoes were nearly broken again. He needed to let them be fixed. Maybe tomorrow. He liked the others still talking. He liked the feeling of not being alone as he had been a month ago. The silence reminding him of long nights in a cell. His pillows wet with tears. But here he didn't have to cry.

If something happened Farah would use his gun and save him. She'd done it before. Amanda would call the Rowdy 3, and for her they would protect him. Sharky would turn into a shark, and kill his enemies. And Todd would be Todd, do something brilliant, maybe brilliantly stupid, but nevertheless. He would save him. Dirk fell asleep knowing that he wasn't alone anymore.

 

“It was nothing, really. We just searched for the kitten. And Dirk slipped, fell into the lake.”

“What about the blood?”, Farah asked. Todd shrugged his shoulders. “You didn't let him drive, did you? You did. This is just stupid, Todd.”

“How does he drive?”, Amanda asked.

“He doesn't anymore”, Todd said.

“Don't you dare drive with him”, Farah warned. Amanda nodded, planning her next trip with Dirk behind the wheel.

Wearily Todd leaned against the fridge. “Dirk, do you want to eat or drink something?” No reply. “Dirk?” He exchanged glances with the others.

Dirk always answered. Mostly answered before they even had the chance to ask him. Claiming he just knew what they were about to ask, but no it wasn't a psychic. Todd went over to the couch.

Relief flooding him when he spotted Dirk fast asleep. A smile on his face. Carefully Todd pulled his legs onto the sofa, and untied his shoelaces. Taking Dirk's shoes off. Farah fetched a blanket, and spread it over him. Sharky lying next to him. Snuggled against his chest, curled up in a small ball of fur.

“Is he okay?”, Farah asked.

“I hope he will be”, Todd answered, tucking the blanket over Dirk's shoulders. “I hope he will be.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it :D
> 
> Feel free to leave a Kudos, drop a line, or swing by my blog pursuecrazylife.tumblr.com  
> Thank you so much for reading.


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